Come on in

Welcome to my second blogging effort.  Why a second blog, you ask?  Well, the other one is about religious matters and there were things I wanted to write about that I didn't feel were appropriate there.  Plus, I'm hoping to draw readership for the other one.  You see, people that ordinarily wouldn't be caught dead reading something religious will read this and be so smitten by the quality of my writing that they'll have to switch over and read "But, not yet".  That's the plan anyway, we'll see what happens

Am I the only person tired of being strong armed by 8 year old girls selling cookies?  Today, as I was leaving the grocery store, I was accosted by some little thug holding a case of cookies.  I was coming out of the store, relieved to out because I hate shopping on Saturday morning when she jumped out at me and yelled "EXCUSE ME, WOULD YOU LIKE TO BUY SOME GIRL SCOUT COOKIES!!!"  It kind of took me surprise.  I mean, who expects some cute little girl to practically knock them down, rifle through their pockets for money and shove a box of cookies in their mouth?  But, I'd seen them on the way in, so I was prepared for her..., I thought.  "No thank you, I already bought some" (which I'm still waiting on) I responded.  Or tried to respond, because about the time I got out "No thank you", she yelled again "WOULD YOU LIKE TO MAKE A DONATION TO OUR TROOP?"  I just shook my head and kept on walking.  I kept on walking because I didn't have any cash to give and I wasn't about to trust this budding carnival barker with my credit card.  I didn't say anything because I couldn't believe her audacity.  Good Lord, somebody tell these girls that beating people over the head isn't going to help their sales.
 
Worse than that are the little ones whose parents know you and they know what a soft touch you are, whether for their kids or the cookies.  I mean, come on, who can say no to a little 5 or 6 year old who screwed up the courage to come over and ask if you want some of the most delectable treats known to man.  Nobody can resist that, it's not freakin' fair! But, worst of all, are the parents who come in with the order form and corner you in the break room.  "How many boxes of cookies can I put you down for?"  Like it's some forgone conclusion that I want some cookies.  Just because I have a donut in my hand and powdered sugar on my shirt doesn't mean I'm down for cookies.  And, thinking that because I'm not all slim and svetle is stereotyping and that's wrong.  My daughters are slowly but surely aging out of things like Scouting and such where high-pressure sales tactics seem to part and parcel of fundraising.  Which is good, but it also kind of sucks.  Good because it's one less headache to deal with.  Sucks because I don't have anything to irritate the break-room thug with anymore. 

The worst part about Girl Scout cookies is that they're so good I can't eat just a couple.  Oh no, once the box is open, it's just a matter of minutes before they're all gone.  Well, it used to be minutes.  The stupid Girl Scouts changed the recipe of the greatest culinary contribution of the Western World: The Samoa.  You remember the Samoa, a ring-shaped cookie, sprinkled with coconut and drizzled with caramel and dark chocolate.  A box of the original Samoa's might make it home from wherever I picked them up, but just barely.  Now, in all their wisdom, they quit using dark chocolate and switched to namby-pamby milk chocolate.  I'll still eat them, but it's under protest.  This is a double-edged sword, however.  I'm a diabetic (type II) and the last thing I need is box of Girl Scout cookies.  I keep telling myself, if I can't have them, at least I'm not missing out perfection. 

If I sound like a jerk, be assured that I'm not.  A bit curmudgeonly, yes.  But, not a jerk.  I'm just tired of being swarmed by kids selling stuff every time I go to the friggin' store.  Oh well, it won't last much longer.  Will it?